I’m a football, basketball and track coach at a local junior high. I have competed and won multiple championships throughout my career. As a result I have drawn envy and hate from the people around me. They criticize and judge every chance they get it’s become part of the field. Little that these “haters” know is that I’ve been criticized and judged all my life for as long as I can remember. There I was three years old hearing these grown men talk trash to me. All my life I’ve been told that I was no good, that I’m not smart enough, strong enough, tall enough, etc. You name it. Of course I didn’t believe them because I knew that I was capable of winning, I knew I had a fighting chance. Plus, I was confident in my abilities. And growing up with two brothers made me a strong competitor.I’m a diehard Los Angeles Lakers fan. I think it’s great that people cling on a team that they can call their own whether it be a home team or not. It’s a beautiful thing when families together. It allows to hold gatherings and create a bond for one cause. Everyone is on the same page sharing victories and defeat, but it’s those celebrations that make everything worth it because it adds great memories that will last a lifetime. It helps that my team has a history of being one of the most successful franchises and have the best player in the game today. My entire family cheers for the Lakers and enjoy attending live games, wearing, and promoting memorabilia publicly with pride. Hence, the hate and envy has tried to fire away in order to spoil our fun. Misery loves company. After all these years of studying why these type of haters hate, I have come to the conclusion that it is because they are fans of unsuccessful teams or no teams at all. They will try to intervene in a negative way with their ignorance, not having any prior knowledge as to why the team suffered a loss or any knowledge of the sport period, and will only use the final result as an opportunity to rub it in, even though in many cases they hadn’t even watch the game. Little did they know, that the champions were determined in a best out of seven games series and one loss did not predict the overall final outcome.
Friends of Foes?I kid you not that my brother and I since 2007 will sit there with our phones it front of us waiting for people to call and talk trash after a loss.
Beep! Beep! My phone will ring.
“Who is it?” My brother would ask, and I would say “It is so and so a former colleague of mine that I haven’t heard from in 3 years talking smack.”
Beep! Beep! His phone would ring.
Who is it? I would ask. He would say, “It’s so and so a former classmate of mind talking mess again.”
Text after text, phone call after phone call and we realize it’s the same people over and over year after year that we have no choice but to add to our “haters” list. If that person is a true fan of the opposing team that beat us, then he or she does not make the list, but a true fan is a person that has been cheering for that team for years and actually watches the sport, but this is rarely the case.
Trash talking is not a bad thing. In a way, it’s what makes the competition fun. True fans, not of the game but of the sport know when to trash talk. I personally only trash talk when I’m being trash talked. At the end of the season I’m in Figueroa St. in downtown Los Angeles enjoying the parade, screaming my lungs out, seizing that special moment.
When the Lakers win my brother and I will sit there with our phones it front of us waiting for people to call and trash talk, but we don’t hear a dang thing as if our phones were on silent. Of course we double check and make sure they’re not. Moments later the texts and calls start coming in from nothing but friends and family congratulating and telling us how they plan to celebrate. It’s a beautiful thing :’( Tears of joy is what one of brothers said one year when I was in Downtown Disney in Anaheim after the Lakers won the championship in Orlando. You just don’t forget these things.
You win some you lose some and life goes on. Because this beautiful life goes on, sadly our enemies will continue to take shots at us, it comes with the territory. You can really test your so called friendships. We’ve lost several people who we thought were friends because of it. Really? Over a basketball game that they don’t know anything about? I guess that’s how you find out who your friends are. If I have respect for someone I’m not going to call or text or mention anything about any of their failures even if my team woop their team’s butt for one they may feel devastated why should we their friend who is supposed to make them feel better make them feel worse. Guard your comments, don’t say anything at all, after all it’s not going to be nice. If you must say something make complementary ones such as, “Your team played good, it was a great game that it could have gone either way.” Other than that hush because you never know what could happen, tables may turn.
“People are either with you or against you; one or the other no in between.”
Bottom line is that if anybody talks trash or questions anything you represent or anything that you are passionate about: your favorite team; school; university; employer; career; family; brand of clothes you wear; type of food you love; city you often visit; your statistics; skills; culture; etc. If they have the nerve to rub something in your face when any of the above mentioned falls short then you might have to question their friendship. That person deserves to be on the “haters list.”
